Well, fuck…

Oh, how sweet, hopeful, naive and ignorant I was at the beginning of this year. And why not? Though 2015 wasn’t pleasant, it wasn’t all that bad. It made 2016 look promising.

How wrong I was.

As you can probably tell, all those “goals” I had at the start of the year fell though. The year was wrought with upsets, tragedies, and the biggest slap in the face you could imagine. I was left with little to no desire to pick up the pieces and carry on. If I am one thing, it’s not a go-getter. I’m a sitter and muddler. And that’s what I did for most of the year. Sat and muddled over things of, perhaps, little to no consequence and let my plans fade away.

Blog more? I don’t have anything positive to espouse.

Meal planning? Why bother when you get go to a drive-thru.

Eat less meat? But it’s so much easier than actually trying…

Stop being lazy? But this couch is comfortable and look! Youtube videos for hours…

Exercise? Pssh.

Draw? Who has the energy?

Take care of myself? Nah.

Okay… I did manage the shower curtain part. But we didn’t even bother with decorations this year.

DIY…? If you count buying needless furniture I still haven’t assembled, then yeah… sure.

And as you can see, the blog is still the same old same old.

So I’ll breach this new year with a bit of trepidation. 2016 undid a lot of good things. 2017 is poised to take more. All I can do is try to make the best of it. And for that, I really am going to have to try. Wishing everyone luck in the coming year. Unless, you know, you intend on hurting people or what have you. Then fuck off. :]


What to fix in two-thousand and six…-teen

Two-thousand and fifteen was pretty much a laugh of productivity. In that I laughed at myself whenever I set out to be productive because I know myself better than that. Hopefully the new year will see some improvements, though doubtful. The progression of time really only shows itself when we’re trying to remember to use a different digit when writing down the date. Thankfully a 5 is very easily changed into a 6. What a blessing this new year will be.

Though to aid in my delusion that, “This year will be different!” I’m going to write down some goals. Maybe I won’t be completely successful at these by the time 2017 rolls around, but hopefully I will have made a start.

Write blog posts more often (the bar is pretty low here, so it shouldn’t be too hard)

Master the art of meal planning

Eat less meat (hell, I used to be a vegetarian and I managed okay…)

Stop being so gosh-darned lazy (if I see it/think it, do it!)

Play the damned video games you own (though this may conflict with other plans I have…)

Start exercising again and keep to it (even if I see zero change and feel super discouraged and want to quit because if it’s not helping, why even bother?!)

Draw stuff (doesn’t have to be great, but maybe this year I’ll actually finish a challenge, hm?)

Take better care of my body

Maybe take down the Halloween shower curtain before summer…

DIY projects!

Clean up ye ol’ blog

Hey, four months of not posting again. I’m on a roll here.

Last month my computer became *cue overly dramatic music*… Infected! Easy-peasy, lemon-squeezey. Anti-virus should be able to handle it, right? No?… Anti-virus is less than useless you say? It’s one of those right-nasty fuckers of a Trojan come to play in my internet traffic and registry files? And there are forty-four instances of it? Well then… I suppose I shall have to cleanse the computer with the holy fire of a flamethrowing.

OR I could format the computer. I’ve never done that before, so… no. Okay.

OR I could clean the virus out manually! Like the whip-smart nerd I am… not. Hrm. Next.

OR I could wait until the anti-virus definitions update and clean it out for me!

… Weeks later and you still can’t do anything about it, eh, AVG? Oh, Oh, now you’re pretending it was never there in the first place? Well I have the screencaps to prove otherwise, you little squirmy bastard. I know it was there and you can’t tell me you managed to clean it out. Fine, FINE. I will descend into the guts of my computer’s OS, find the infection, and cut it out like a BOSS*. Snippy, snippy, mother-fucker.

*Or quietly replace the computer wholesale and hope no one notices.

I didn’t even use “fuck” once in this post. Wait, oh… Well, fuck.

This blog needs some lovin’ I think. And since nothing truly epic has happened, you’ll have to endure these tiny, nonsensical snippets.*

My last update was on the cusp of cancelling my long standing relationship with broadcast/cable television. The months were filled with achieving all my long standing goals and ended with a real sense of accomplishment. And unicorns do exist and they do fart rainbows.

Truth be told, I accomplished not a damned thing. Well, I did start drawing daily, until that petered out nine days in. I managed to sew a wolf tail for my hubby’s Halloween costume and hey, threw a Halloween party that people actually came to! That was exciting. The decorations are totally still up because I am lazy and Christmas can wait its turn, dern it.

Good news, I still have a job. Bad news, I still have to get up and go to work. And really, that’s why I fail at being productive. It’s all work’s fault.

I currently spend more time daily staring at a computer screen than I used to and I think it’s effecting my sleep more than it used to. Naps on the couch have become a daily occurrence, but I can’t be too upset. That couch is so comfy. And possibly sucking out bits of my soul one nap at a time.**

We cat-sat for my in-laws at the beginning of October. Two darling orange lard-balls I saved as babies back in 2011 from chilly April weather. It wasn’t always great (re: failed drawing project), but when you end up buried underneath 14+ pounds of fur and love, can you really complain? (Well, probably, but that’s only if you can still breath.)

My car suffered its first flat tire. And try as we did (for two days), that tired would not come off. Lesson learned, undo the over-torqued bullshit your mechanic does to your tires before you need to battle the lug nut with your sturdy tire iron. Thankfully, it was sitting in the garage when it happened and I didn’t have to stage the epic seige on the side of some random road where driver-by-ers could stare and laugh and then careen off the road because they were rubbernecking like idiots and deserve the fiery blaze than never came. It’s fixed now. Still don’t know where I picked up the glass, though.

Thanksgiving squeezed itself into the mix at some point. It was full of food. Everyone was surprised we came prepared with food containers to squirrel away leftovers. Which is a little weird since people always insist on us taking some home. So instead of stealing their food containers or, erm… coming up with a dubious carriage solutions… we planned ahead.***

And lastly, though I don’t participate in Black Friday, or even Cyber Monday nonsense, but this is what I imagine it would have looked like:

Crazy remains of a Black Friday gone horribly wrong.

*Really pleased I was able to write “nonsensical” correctly the first time. Go me.
**Jokes on it, there’s not much a soul to begin with
***And looked amazing to the in-laws. Like a boss

My Pandora is filled with angry, screaming men now…

Sadly, no, I have not been neglecting this blog because crazy awesome things have been happening my life. It’s been the same quiet and uneventful thing it has always been and will always be.* Come October, though, things are getting a shake up.

I’m cancelling my cable television service. (But not my internet, no… that stays for reasons…) And my house is like an anti-OTA faraday cage, so this means no television whatsoever.

This is going to be sheer torture.

I’ve never been without a television on to fill the background with random noises. I’m the child that woke up at 6am, with no prompting or device, to watch cartoons before returning to bed before anyone else got up. The child that watched television all day long (it does indeed rot your brain…), knows far too many commercials by heart, and can leave the most boring shows ever on just to kill the void of silence.

So in essence, I have a problem. But this is not why I’m cancelling my service. It’s going because FUCK YOU COMCAST and I like saving money.** And soon I will have the problem of nothing to do for hours and hours and hours and hours…

Or I could read books, draw, paint, write, sew, clean the damn freakin’ house, garden, cook, listen to music, pester my cats, call friends, watch Netflix/Hulu(Plus)/movies/DVDs/Blu-rays, exercise, build stuff, or even go for a walk.

Like I said, this is going to be miserable…

*Though I still want to go the ISS

The bras were burned because women were told to wear them*

Hey… psst… go here -> Link-ie link-ie. Read that post. Heck, read the comments! Some good stuff there.

It’s about time people realized Feminism isn’t an GIRLS ONLY party**. Everyone is welcome because it effects everybody. So pull up a chair, sit down, listen to the conversation. It’s a good one we should all be having.

*At least that’s my guess. *shrugs*
**Or an anti-men thing. “Femi-nazi” was created to make women who spoke out for fair treatment the enemy of all.

This is just to meet my monthly quota…

So I’ve started a sketch blog over at ye ol’ tumblr. Yes, my dire hatred of social media will continue to baffle the masses.

Regardless, it’s there. And is pretty empty. But don’t worry, it will soon be filled with worthless doodles on inane “chibi”-like drawings. However, my goal is to improve my art, so there will be other, not so cute things. And probably boobs and penises. Because I’ll be going over to deviantART’s reference shots and artistic nudes and “THERE BE NEKED PEOPLE.” So, if penises and boobs and stupid doodles offend you, you should probably avoid it.

If they don’t and you want to leave a helpful/insightful critique, you are more than welcome.*

Oh, and if you should come across any wild fiction among the drawings, don’t be afraid. If you stay really, really still, it can’t see you.

*Or you can say really nasty and unhelpful things. You know, waste my time. Waste your time. General be a waste of time and space.

Today I was not clawed by a wild turkey… so, win?


I know, I know. Zoos are evil. Poor, wild animals stuck in enclosures way too small for them and diets not quite what they should be. I should be feeling guilty about going to them and supporting them with my monies. Oh, well.

I still had fun last Monday when my husband and I went to the Milwaukee Zoo. It was a cloudy day with rain forecasted and just cold enough to keep most of the crowds at bay. And I had my new camera along for the visit.

Last time we went they were having a special event where you could actually pet the stingrays and small sharks. Of course I did it. Stingrays are cold and “slimy.” The sharks felt like sandpaper. It was awesome.

This time we bee-lined for the big cats because if you don’t get there early it will be full of loud and annoying children whose parents refuse to reign them in or adhere to the “STAY OFF THE LEDGE” signs, so clearly displayed. I dislike those children and their idiot parents.*

Thankfully, we did indeed beat the crowd to the enclosures so I actually got to see the big cats. I got to take pictures of them and stand so close, the only thing between me and teeth and claws was an inch of glass. And being the adult that I am, I refrained from banging on that glass.**

That maturity ended as soon as I got near the free-range peafowl. I was naughty and walked right up to a beautiful peahen and took her picture. She was sweet and didn’t try to peck my eyes out. Thank you, peahen.

I love hearing the peacocks crying about the zoo. Their obnoxious chorus is instantly recognizable and humorous. Something we consider so regal making that kind of horrible sound. It’s hysterical.

I wish those families would use these zoos as an opportunity to teach those ill-mannered brats the importance of caring for their planet. To stand up for the fair treatment of animals and work hard to end senseless murder. There should be a questionnaire you have to answer about conservation before you are allowed to exit the parking lot.

*Which was the reptile section this time. Small space, LOUD CHILDREN, and lazy parents.
**People, don’t let your horrible children bang the damn glass. Keep them in line, sheesh.
***In other news, I got a raise at work and “rescued” a wild turkey that got a little trapped in the partially fenced in parking lot.

“Shit is it cold. Did… did my toe just fall off?…”

I did not start this blog with the intention of it being for DIY projects. But I have cable and I really, really hate my house.* And the internet, which one DIY blog usually leads to another and then another and another… The projects in my head begin to become a mound of ideas that end up piled on top of each other in a corner. It has made me a little dizzy.

Perhaps the biggest dilemma is money. I’m not rolling in it** and I’m terrible at bargain hunting and cannot seem to bring myself to buy used. So every project seems to be stopped dead before I can pick up my sledge hammer and start knocking down walls. In fact, I don’t even have a sledge hammer yet. Someone should fix that. I’d also like some Dremel tools, an oscillator, an air compressor with nail and staple gun accessories, a miter saw, etc…

I still do not intend to make this a DIYer blog. However it probably will see me mentioning projects now and again, specifically because someone has asked me about them. As such, mayhaps a list? Something of a 2014-goals-around-the house list? So, without further ado, I give to you!…
2014 projects of the DIY kind

Claiming the “grown up” room in the house: now, this might not seem like much of a DIY project, but it probably will be. It involved repainting the entire room, adding an accent wall via gloss paint over matte with a stencil, creating a headboard for the bed, installing a closet system, replacing the missing closet doors, new trimming and moulding (flooring?), and (my BIG wish) replacing the patio doors with new French doors to the outside.

Turning our old bedroom into a curiosity/game/library room: repainting the walls, adding in new moulding and trim, removing the door entirely, possibly turning that closet into a cleaning supply depot so I can have my hall closet back as linen closet?…

Replacing the doors. All of them (that I haven’t specifically ditched). And their hardware. I’ll learn how to frame a door if I have to. Plumb and level, baby.

Creating a desk area in the “office” (after we get it in usable condition) in that bedroom’s closet. I saw it online.

Mounting the television on the wall in the living room, fashioning a console table out of an old dresser (also seen online), taking that sledgehammer you are buying me to my old entertainment center in the backyard as I gibber incoherent nonsense, shrilly, back-lit by a bonfire so I can freak out the nosy neighbors.

Replace the under sink cabinet that was growing mold.*** (This includes working with my father, which is always a bonus.)

Build the gaming table I promised my hubby… and maybe this one. In case you are wondering, these would be used for the nerdy endeavor of miniature war gaming and table top gaming. Because that’s how we roll in the house.

I have other ideas in mind, but I probably wouldn’t be able to fit it all into one year. I still have to work for a living, take care of two furry pests, I mean cats… and keep the place livable. Who knows, maybe I will get this house whipped into shape and keep you posted on my progress.

It’s blogger fodder at the very least. :P

*Okay, not entirely true. I just hate how it looks and all the cracks in the plaster/terrible mudding and patch jobs; also, every space is just this side of too little

**And if I was, I would probably pay for someone to fix all the things wrong with this house, sell it, and get something bigger/better/not falling apart…

***As an FYI, check your pipes regularly for leaks so you don’t end up in the same boat… also, sometimes the laziness of house flippers (not removing the old linoleum under said sink) can save your subflooring